It may be uncomfortable for me to write, and uncomfortable for my friends and family to read, but here it is ... it's all on the line.
I'm not doing this because I want to sound superior to anyone else. I'm not doing this because I think I'm better than anyone else. I'm not doing this because I think I've found all of the answers. I'm doing this because I have seen what a small change can make in one life, and my hope is that my friends, family, and those that end up finding and following this blog will not only take from my journey, but add to it as well. Comments are welcome and things you have found that work for you are welcome to be shared.
I want everyone to know that because PCOS is scary at first, I am offering to chat privately as well should you be looking for support. At anytime, email me at jackson.ashley524@gmail.com. I'll be there to listen, offer advise, or to take it should you have suggestions.
And here is the first entry:
THE DIAGNOSIS IS SCARY!
The physician you choose is essential. So many doctors and midwives out there either don't know about the condition, or won't focus on the entire picture. This is my journey with my diagnosis, some will be shocked and others, will find a familiar set of circumstances. ...
When I was 16, my mother became increasingly concerned that my cycle was irregular and insisted that I take a trip to the doctor to get checked out. At my very first appointment, my physician insisted that I start taking birth control to regulate my cycles. She didn't offer any explanation ... just a simple daily pill to fix it. Of course, as a 16 year old girl, I didn't ask why ... my whole life I've always been offered pills to fix a condition, and why should my cycles be any different.
HOWEVER ... I have to praise God that I also had a stomach condition and am not allowed to take pills that are processed in my stomach. After taking my pills for years, I started waking up in the morning with "morning sickness". After several years of dealing with my belly aches and pains, it occurred to me that it may be caused by my pills. I did give the doctor my medical history didn't I. Wouldn't someone catch on along the way that I shouldn't be taking a pill I wasn't supposed to?? I decided that I would bring it up with my midwife on my check up ... and wouldn't you know it ... several years of checkups and exams, no one caught the little mention in my file about my stomach condition to see that I was not supposed to be taking pills that absorbed in the stomach! So after discussing my options (me hiding my anger at my doctors) we decided that we would try Nuvoring ... the ONLY option to regulate my cycles while also having a medication that absorbed in the liver.
That's the first time I heard of Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. This is because right before we talked about the new meds, I suggested that I simply stop taking the medications at all and to see what happened. I didn't need to take them from birth control standpoint ... no need ... I just needed it to regulate my system. "Let's just see what happens" I said "you don't know, maybe the situation has resolved itself" ... "I don't like taking them anyway because the effect my moods anyway". That's when she dropped the bomb ... I had PCOS. She said with my condition I would be stupid to stop taking my medication! Stupid??? PCOS???
???????
She said that they knew from day one that I had this condition. "What does that mean??" I asked. She said that it was a condition that when women do not have regular periods, the tissue in the uterus does not shed and instead decomposes inside the body. When that happens, cancer and ovarian cysts develop making fertility a very real issue. (NOTE: this is only a very small part of the story ... a symptom really, not a cause ... but that info comes later). With my wedding less than a year away, how can I get married in good faith without my spouse knowing if we can have children?
She said not to worry, as long as I took the meds she prescribed, that I would be fine ... that they were "protecting" my womb and my ability to have children. However, she warned that having children would still be difficult and may have to be accomplished with doctor direction and planning.
I took her at her word and left with my script. I paid over $70 a month filling this prescription hoping that one day, I could have children.
I had a discussion with my husband and he said not to worry, kids or no kids, he loved me just the same, and that God would bless us with a life that was child-free or bless us with tons of them. No matter what happened, it would be what He had planned for us and it would all be okay. .... I hate when he's right!
So we paid the bill until one month it went up to $90! We were both, unfortunately, unemployed and had to make a decision. ... we prayed. We felt that it was God's will that I stop taking the medication and put it in his hands. Yet again, God stepped in when we asked for his guidance, he has NEVER steered us wrong.
Over the next year, my cycles were slightly irregular ... however .... I continued to grow. I was always a chubby girl and it got worse with age. Eventually I stopped checking the scale, covering my eyes when I went to the doctor's office when I was sick. I didn't want to know the damage.
Then I hit bottom.
My waistline was to a point where I was about to shelve the size 16's and go to 18's. I broke down into tears in the changing room of JCPenny ... trying to convince myself that I was still attractive ... that I wasn't grossly overweight. My mood was all over the map, flicking from calm to rage in a split second. I know for my husband, life with me was no picnic no matter how much he loved and supported me.
It was time to make a change. That's when God, yet again stepped in ... I got an advertisement in the mail for Douglas Women's Center. My cousin had given birth just a year before with doctors from my office. She said that no matter how many times she insisted that only women see her, they often sent men into the room and refused to listen to her wishes. Because of that I was already inclined to seek new medical care. So, I made an appointment with Lou-Ann.
That's when my life changed forever.
When meeting with Lew-Ann (my husband went with me) ... I didn't look at the scale as usual ... and she sat with me as I described my family and personal medical history. She didn't just scan over what was on the paper, she wanted to hear it from ME! Right when I said that I had been diagnosed with PCOS, she started nodding her head and cut in, saying that everything that I described pointed to that diagnosis. She said "Let me guess, you are the person at the dinner table that eats all of the free rolls and then asks for more". Yup, how did she know???
She ran blood work to confirm the diagnosis (the other doctor didn't do that) and then said, "what do you know about PCOS and how that affects you?". I told her what I was told years ago ... and that's when she smiled and patted my shoulder ... she might as well have said "I'm about to change your life forever". :D
She asked me how I was doing with my decision to stop my meds. I told her that I was struggling with regularity but that I didn't want to go back on them at all. My moods were better but they were still swinging ... my husband had a lot to say about that to Lew-Ann :/. .... She didn't argue, she honored my decision and then gave me the best thing anyone had EVER GIVEN ME! She handed me a stack of literature and told me that she would STRONGLY recommend that I read them closely and let me know that my condition could be handled with diet alone ... if done properly.
She told me that PCOS was not just about fertility. Too many doctors focus on the fertility issue and don't focus on anything else. But PCOS leads to weight gain, early heart disease, and over 40% of PCOS patients are diabetic by age 40. By not focusing on the whole picture, doctors may get you babies but you end up in an early grave and lead a short hard life. Doctors will often focus on fertility treatments and metformin to control the condition .... but she had a better answer. If I had the discipline to do it on my own, she said that life would be completely different for me ... but so many women fail because they don't take it seriously or they lack the discipline. If I couldn't get my levels under control in one years time, she would begin looking into drug therapies.
The day in her office changed my life forever! Since then, I have lost nearly 40lbs. (six months have passed) simply by sticking to a PCOS friendly diet and getting to know my body and how it responds to what I do and how I feed it. I have six months left to go until my appointment but I am confident that my resolve to change my life will please Lew-Ann and the test results will show that I don't need any form of artificial assistance.
The other strong influence in my journey has been Amy at PCOSDiva.com. She has helped me by leaps and bounds in my journey towards health and I can't thank her enough.
I dedicate this post to both Amy and Lew-Ann. Without them, I don't know where I'd be. This blog will document my journey and how I've become successful. However, the only way to reach your goals is to walk daily with the Prince of Peace.
And here is the first entry:
THE DIAGNOSIS IS SCARY!
The physician you choose is essential. So many doctors and midwives out there either don't know about the condition, or won't focus on the entire picture. This is my journey with my diagnosis, some will be shocked and others, will find a familiar set of circumstances. ...
When I was 16, my mother became increasingly concerned that my cycle was irregular and insisted that I take a trip to the doctor to get checked out. At my very first appointment, my physician insisted that I start taking birth control to regulate my cycles. She didn't offer any explanation ... just a simple daily pill to fix it. Of course, as a 16 year old girl, I didn't ask why ... my whole life I've always been offered pills to fix a condition, and why should my cycles be any different.
HOWEVER ... I have to praise God that I also had a stomach condition and am not allowed to take pills that are processed in my stomach. After taking my pills for years, I started waking up in the morning with "morning sickness". After several years of dealing with my belly aches and pains, it occurred to me that it may be caused by my pills. I did give the doctor my medical history didn't I. Wouldn't someone catch on along the way that I shouldn't be taking a pill I wasn't supposed to?? I decided that I would bring it up with my midwife on my check up ... and wouldn't you know it ... several years of checkups and exams, no one caught the little mention in my file about my stomach condition to see that I was not supposed to be taking pills that absorbed in the stomach! So after discussing my options (me hiding my anger at my doctors) we decided that we would try Nuvoring ... the ONLY option to regulate my cycles while also having a medication that absorbed in the liver.
That's the first time I heard of Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. This is because right before we talked about the new meds, I suggested that I simply stop taking the medications at all and to see what happened. I didn't need to take them from birth control standpoint ... no need ... I just needed it to regulate my system. "Let's just see what happens" I said "you don't know, maybe the situation has resolved itself" ... "I don't like taking them anyway because the effect my moods anyway". That's when she dropped the bomb ... I had PCOS. She said with my condition I would be stupid to stop taking my medication! Stupid??? PCOS???
???????
She said that they knew from day one that I had this condition. "What does that mean??" I asked. She said that it was a condition that when women do not have regular periods, the tissue in the uterus does not shed and instead decomposes inside the body. When that happens, cancer and ovarian cysts develop making fertility a very real issue. (NOTE: this is only a very small part of the story ... a symptom really, not a cause ... but that info comes later). With my wedding less than a year away, how can I get married in good faith without my spouse knowing if we can have children?
She said not to worry, as long as I took the meds she prescribed, that I would be fine ... that they were "protecting" my womb and my ability to have children. However, she warned that having children would still be difficult and may have to be accomplished with doctor direction and planning.
I took her at her word and left with my script. I paid over $70 a month filling this prescription hoping that one day, I could have children.
I had a discussion with my husband and he said not to worry, kids or no kids, he loved me just the same, and that God would bless us with a life that was child-free or bless us with tons of them. No matter what happened, it would be what He had planned for us and it would all be okay. .... I hate when he's right!
So we paid the bill until one month it went up to $90! We were both, unfortunately, unemployed and had to make a decision. ... we prayed. We felt that it was God's will that I stop taking the medication and put it in his hands. Yet again, God stepped in when we asked for his guidance, he has NEVER steered us wrong.
Over the next year, my cycles were slightly irregular ... however .... I continued to grow. I was always a chubby girl and it got worse with age. Eventually I stopped checking the scale, covering my eyes when I went to the doctor's office when I was sick. I didn't want to know the damage.
Then I hit bottom.
My waistline was to a point where I was about to shelve the size 16's and go to 18's. I broke down into tears in the changing room of JCPenny ... trying to convince myself that I was still attractive ... that I wasn't grossly overweight. My mood was all over the map, flicking from calm to rage in a split second. I know for my husband, life with me was no picnic no matter how much he loved and supported me.
It was time to make a change. That's when God, yet again stepped in ... I got an advertisement in the mail for Douglas Women's Center. My cousin had given birth just a year before with doctors from my office. She said that no matter how many times she insisted that only women see her, they often sent men into the room and refused to listen to her wishes. Because of that I was already inclined to seek new medical care. So, I made an appointment with Lou-Ann.
That's when my life changed forever.
When meeting with Lew-Ann (my husband went with me) ... I didn't look at the scale as usual ... and she sat with me as I described my family and personal medical history. She didn't just scan over what was on the paper, she wanted to hear it from ME! Right when I said that I had been diagnosed with PCOS, she started nodding her head and cut in, saying that everything that I described pointed to that diagnosis. She said "Let me guess, you are the person at the dinner table that eats all of the free rolls and then asks for more". Yup, how did she know???
She ran blood work to confirm the diagnosis (the other doctor didn't do that) and then said, "what do you know about PCOS and how that affects you?". I told her what I was told years ago ... and that's when she smiled and patted my shoulder ... she might as well have said "I'm about to change your life forever". :D
She asked me how I was doing with my decision to stop my meds. I told her that I was struggling with regularity but that I didn't want to go back on them at all. My moods were better but they were still swinging ... my husband had a lot to say about that to Lew-Ann :/. .... She didn't argue, she honored my decision and then gave me the best thing anyone had EVER GIVEN ME! She handed me a stack of literature and told me that she would STRONGLY recommend that I read them closely and let me know that my condition could be handled with diet alone ... if done properly.
She told me that PCOS was not just about fertility. Too many doctors focus on the fertility issue and don't focus on anything else. But PCOS leads to weight gain, early heart disease, and over 40% of PCOS patients are diabetic by age 40. By not focusing on the whole picture, doctors may get you babies but you end up in an early grave and lead a short hard life. Doctors will often focus on fertility treatments and metformin to control the condition .... but she had a better answer. If I had the discipline to do it on my own, she said that life would be completely different for me ... but so many women fail because they don't take it seriously or they lack the discipline. If I couldn't get my levels under control in one years time, she would begin looking into drug therapies.
The day in her office changed my life forever! Since then, I have lost nearly 40lbs. (six months have passed) simply by sticking to a PCOS friendly diet and getting to know my body and how it responds to what I do and how I feed it. I have six months left to go until my appointment but I am confident that my resolve to change my life will please Lew-Ann and the test results will show that I don't need any form of artificial assistance.
The other strong influence in my journey has been Amy at PCOSDiva.com. She has helped me by leaps and bounds in my journey towards health and I can't thank her enough.
I dedicate this post to both Amy and Lew-Ann. Without them, I don't know where I'd be. This blog will document my journey and how I've become successful. However, the only way to reach your goals is to walk daily with the Prince of Peace.
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